Female Smoking Hookah

Hookah smoking, which most American children first became acquainted with after watching the animated Alice in Wonderland, is becoming increasingly popular among first-year college women, many of who (incorrectly) believe that hookah smoke is a relatively innocuous alternative to cigarettes. The study, funded by those concerned souls over at the National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism, suggests a link between hookah smoking and alcohol and marijuana use, as well as an increased propensity for pretension. (That last thing is made up, but it seems like it should be the primary risk associated with hookah smoking.) Researchers found that women who drank more alcohol were more likely to use hookah, and, from there, it was only another lilypad hop to smoking pot in their pajamas all day while the self-appointed "film buff" in their circle of friends puts on The Seventh Seal and glares every time someone has the audacity to giggle at the silly make-up. We should all take these findings very seriously, according to the researchers involved with this study, because hookah smoke has been linked to many of the same diseases caused by cigarette smoke, such as lung cancer, respiratory illness, and periodontal disease. However, if college kids can't gather around a smoldering something, how are they going to make friends from scratch, impressing each other with humorous anecdotes about all the truly reckless high school things they never actually did? Lead author Robyn L. Fielder, acknowledging the social facility of gathering in a smoke circle, warned that college freshman are at particularly high risk for developing unhealthy behavior patterns because they're all so susceptible to the urge to make friends in any way they can.